Forever your's
by captainme
Summary: Jack's somthing to say goodbye to a certain someone... oneshot, R&R, JackAna


A/N wow! I'm so impressed with my muse. It's been thinking of another quick little fic… IN THE SAME WEEK! Yay for that… it amazes me what your mind comes up with when you attempt to concentrate of something completely irrelevant. I was sat in a science exam this morning when this popped into my head and started writing itself out. And then again in the afternoon exam. (But by then I'd finished and was daydreaming! Hehe) Anyway enough with my pointless babble and on with the fic! Sorry if it's too mushy or whatever, and doesn't really seem in character but I had to write it down and thought I might as well share… anyway, after all these are deeper feelings. Enough with giving it all away… enjoy! (And review! Thanks!)

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The pair of them lay there. Hardly moving. A massive bandage covered most of his stomach, a spot in the middle, soaked in blood. Her head was on his chest, her arms careful not to touch his wound. She was asleep, her gentle breathing lulling him into a sense of false security. His head was turned so he could watch her, take in every detail of her face. He sighed closing his eyes for a brief second before snapping them back open. He couldn't sleep. He wouldn't allow himself to. But lying there wasn't helping his cause. It would be so easy just to close his eyes, just for a moment and let the darkness close in around him.

Jack took Anamaria's head, and gently lifted her off him and onto the pillow. As he began to move out of bed, the pain was visible on his face, yet he was careful not to make a sound. The bandage would have to be changed again soon. It had only been an hour since last time, yet it was sodden again. Jack attempted to walk over to his desk, only just managing to get there before his legs gave up. Sat on his chair opposite the bed he could see Anamaria clearly. She had shifted herself to get comfortable. Once again a sigh managed to escape his lips.

Looking down on his desk, he saw the piece of paper. The pen was next to it, waiting. Waiting for him to begin writing, doing a job he had always done. Only this time, he wasn't about to write the log or do any of the captains job. No. For the first time in his life he was about to write a letter. Somehow he had managed to avoid that job, always getting someone else to do it for him. "I'm not good with words ye see". That line worked every time. Taking a deep breath (and quite obviously regretting it, from the pain that shot through him) he took up the pen and began writing…

_Hello Darling… shock isn't it. For me to be writing a letter for once in my life. Funny thing is, I have all these things I want to say, yet I can't even begin to write them down. How do I do it? How can I put all these thoughts inside my head onto paper where you'll understand it? I need you to understand you see. I can't… I don't want you to go without knowing for the rest of your life. I know really I should be saying these things face to face but I don't think I can. Captain Jack Sparrow can't get the words out. Never thought you'd hear that now did you love?_

_Let's think. Where can I start? I guess at the beginning, but that seems such a long time ago. Can it really have been 15 years since we met? I remember it as clear as I would have had it been yesterday. I was getting ready for my first trip out as a pirate captain. **The Black Pearl** had only been mine for a number of weeks, after I had saved obsessively for three years. I was walking along that beach, you remember? Wasn't watching where I was going, knocked into you, and almost sent you flying... what was it you called me? "Stupid idiot of a man" I think it was, giving me a glare. But at that point in your life you hadn't mastered the one you have today, that could turn a man to stone. I should be thankful really. I was only 20 and didn't know how to defend myself from those looks. Before I could even apologise you'd gone, stalked off without as much as a look back. I remember I just shrugged my shoulders, watched you go, and then carried on my merry little way. Little did I know we would meet again not 4 hours later. I can still picture you sat on that stool in the back of the tavern, out of everyone's way. I still down know who you were waiting for. You refused to tell me then, and no doubt would still today. You couldn't believe it when I came over. Stumbling on words trying to say sorry. You clearly didn't want to know, so I left it. Went back over to my crew, finding some strumpet along the way. I didn't have quite the reputation I do now, but it was on its way to being made. I honestly don't know how I began talking to you. I can't remember for the life of me. One minuet I was on my own and the next… there you were, sat beside me, half drunk and doubled over laughing, as was I. For the week before I set off, we spent almost every night drinking and playing cards. You were easy to beat back then, a naïve 17 year old who didn't cheat. Now however… now I'd be lucky to beat you. _

_I think after that week I didn't see you for about a year. I don't know what you were doing when we first met, but when I saw you again you were a pick pocket. And a bloody quick one too. I think it was that feminine charm you used to possess, I can't believe that the same Anamaria who made men weak at the knees, is the one that would quite happily rob them of their manhood. I know for a fact those charms you had worked on me, resulting in you stealing the bag of coins in my pocket. I couldn't believe how daft I had been. It caused me to hunt you down and demand for it back. I remember so clearly how you almost wet yourself laughing at me. I couldn't do much but laugh too… I was only in Tortuga for a few days, but within those days we became close friends didn't we? Ok, maybe not close friends but defiantly friends. I still knew nothing about you, yet you seemed to know everything about me. The truth that is. That night when we lay on the deck of the **Pearl** looking up at the stars simply talking has stayed in my mind ever since. That night you got the truth out of me about my upbringing. How it wasn't as terrible as though story's made it out to be. That I wasn't the bastered son of a whore who had hit me 100 times every night until I ran away aged 12 and worked on ships. How really I was brought up in a middle class home, 4 brothers and 3 sisters, sent to work on a navy ship at 12 that were attacked by pirates. That the pirate captain had taken pity on my life and let me work for him. No one but you knew that story then, and it's still like that today. _

_Each time I was in Tortuga after that we met up didn't we darling? Getting to know each other a little bit more each time. Although, most of the time we only saw each other during the day, in the evening you would go off and do your thing, and I would go get drunk and sleep with whatever whore was offering herself to me. Then that time came when I was stuck in the pit hole of a town for a month as my ship was repaired. I think you were about 18 and a half, and I was 21 and a half. Still so young. I remember you telling me of your dream to buy your own boat, and have your own freedom. Nothing fancy like the **Pearl** but just something to get you through. We were out that night, one of the few nights out we had together back then, when you were attacked by those drunken men. You hated the fact that you needed me to protect you and stop them from doing any real damage to you. I think that was the night when you got that fire that leaves many men shaking with fear now. You wanted me to teach you how to use a sword, how to defend yourself. So I did. Now you're as good as me in a fight, if not better. You're not afraid to kick a man where it hurts, whereas I could never do that to another male, through fear of having it done to myself. When you fought it was as though you were dancing not fighting. Dancing… now that takes me back. I may have been the one to teach you how to fight, but you were the one that had to teach me how to dance. It wasn't until a couple of years ago, Will and Lizzie's wedding it was for. I had never had to dance in my life before that. You couldn't believe it when I came asking for help. All those nights spent down in the brig so the crew wouldn't see. Now I understand where those moves come from while you're fighting. Why when you're against an opponent instead of saying "bring it on" its "lets dance". It still makes me smile when I think of the amount of times I stood on your toes by accident, so you did it back, twice as painful on purpose. "I'm just teaching you a lesson captain." Yeah right! You just enjoy making me squirm Anamaria!_

_Back to where I was before I got ahead of myself. I had known you seven years when I stole that boat of yours you loved so much. Seven years. Seemed like forever, but now, I see it was nothing. I don't know whether you'll be happy to know she was in good condition for 5 years. I kept her strong, she kept me going. I always thought I'd bring her back to you Ana. I always meant to. But before I could do that, I had to get my pride and joy back. Then that storm hit and the thing got a hole in it. I only just managed to get to Port Royal without being fish food. I'm sorry. Then… then when I saw you on those docks just before we went to get the **Black Pearl** back from Barbossas slimy hands, I didn't know what to do. That slap you gave me, the first of many might I add, sent a shock wave through my body. It seemed the pent up anger and frustration from what I did to you, was all released in that one slap and it hurt like hell! But then, maybe it wasn't the slap that hurt me, but the fact I knew what I had done to you. Someone I considered a friend. But then, then after all that I had done to you, after all the pain I had caused you, you bought my ship back to me Ana. I still don't understand why you did it. You saved my life in more ways then one that day. Every time I've asked you about it, you always insist it was the crews decision not yours. It might have been their decision but you're the one that made them think it. I know for a fact that even before they had agreed you had set course for Port Royal. A year later it was Will and Lizzie's wedding night._

_I remember it so well, do you? After months of treading on your toes the time had come for me to show off my dancing skills. I only hope I made you proud. I asked you to come with me. You believed it was just because you were the only female crewmate but that just wasn't it. That night was the first time I had seen you wear a dress in 13 years. And you looked more beautiful then ever that night. I think that was the night I fell in love with you Anamaria. Although of course, we didn't give in until 6 months later, when we were both supposed to be on night watch. I think all that tension had been bubbling under both of our surfaces for some time, before we just couldn't keep it in any longer. It makes me laugh when I think back to our pathetic attempts to pretend nothing had happened. After each and every time. And then finally when we did give in, we then attempted to hide it from the crew. It didn't work too well did it? I think they knew we were in love before we did. _

_Before, I used to think I had many regrets from my life. But now, I don't think so. All those things I used to regret, I realize now, that without those mistakes we would never have what we have now. I used to sit at night, wishing I had never made Barbossa my first mate all those years ago. But if I hadn't, and I hadn't lost my ship, would I still be with you today? If I hadn't stolen your boat, would you have come after me? Would we even still know each other? You see, if I hadn't have made all those mistakes, I think I would have the biggest regret of all. I wouldn't have been able to love you. Of course I may not have known this mistake, but my soul would have, it would have known that there was something, somebody, missing from my life. I might have spent my life searching for something that had been right in front of me. That darling would have been far, far worse._

_Now it saddens me to think that time is running out. That this time next year, next month, next week or maybe even tomorrow I'll never see that smile of yours, and the way it lights up your eyes, I'll never hear your laugh, or see the fire in your soul as you argue and fight with me. I can't go without letting you know how much I do love you. You never believed me when I told you before, but you have to believe me now. You always thought that you came second in my heart, after the sea and the pearl. But now. Now you're above them, you've stolen it from them and you hold it in your hands and in your heart. No matter what happens to you after I've gone, just know that I'm watching over you. _

_I love you._

_Forever your's, Jack xxx _

Finally folding up the pieces of paper, Jack slipped them into an envelope. On the front of it, it simply said _Anamaria_. Propping it up so she would be able to spot it, Jack stood up again. Carefully, and slowly he began walking back to his bed. Before he lay back down next to his girl, he changed the bandage. The wound he had received 2 weeks before had stopped bleeding badly, but wept a lot. It was badly infected, and would soon give Jack a fever he knew he wouldn't be able to beat. It was 7 inches long, across his stomach. He had been lucky to last as long as he had without getting the fever. But he could already feel it taking place inside him, setting in ready for his last battle. The one that he was going to lose.

Lying back down again, he nudged Anamaria enough to take her back in his arms. Finally he let the darkness fold around him.

Jack battled the fever for 2 days after that night before letting go. Anamaria hadn't moved from his side for the entire time. Not long after he had gone did she notice the letter, propped up against a candle. As she took out the letter a necklace fell out. Frowning she put it on the table. As she read tears came to her eyes. At the end she took the necklace in her hands and looked at it properly. It was an emerald shaped like a heart. In scripted on the golden set that it was in were the words "forever yours". Jack bought the necklace months before, but couldn't find the right time to give it to her. Slipping it around her neck, Anamaria smiled and whispered "I love you too" in his ear.

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A/N please review and tell me what you think. It's a really strange story I think, and im not sure whether or not its in character of Jack. My muse doesn't really think of Jack from the movie anymore I don't think, he's been changed by my constant Jack and Ana fics. Im not sure whether the ending was very good, but I couldn't seem to find a way to write what I wanted to. Anyway please review on your way out! Thanks! Captainme x 


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